


My Final Message (Mark’s POV)

by one_player_game



Category: Unus Annus - Fandom
Genre: CrankGameplays - Freeform, M/M, Markiplier - Freeform, Unus Annus, crankiplier - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:48:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24637852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_player_game/pseuds/one_player_game
Summary: Mark only has a year left to live. He wants to spend it with his best friend. So with that Unus Annus was created. To teach people to cherish what they have when they have. Unus Annus is Mark’s final message.Check out ClumsyWeirdo_100 for Ethan’s POV on this story. She will have longer writing than I will probably.
Relationships: Mark Fischbach/Ethan Nestor
Kudos: 50





	1. Finding out

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ClumsyWeirdo_100](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClumsyWeirdo_100/gifts).



> This story is in multiple parts, also please go check out ClumsyWeirdo_100 if you want to see it from Ethan’s POV. This is her first story!!

I hadn’t really been feeling so good, I was vomiting and passing out a lot. I always felt dizzy and sick. I thought it was just the flu. So every time that Amy tried to get me to see a Doctor I just didn’t go. I said  
“I’m most likely just sick with the flu and I’ll be fine. There is no reason for me to go to the doctor. The medical bills would be crazy.” Usually, she would believe me and leave it alone. 

Until I ended up on the floor passed out with my shirt covered in my own vomit. Amy panicked and tried to wake me up and called Ethan to take me to the hospital.

“Yeah, he’s awake now. Can you take him while I stay with Henry and Chica? Henry has been having digestive problems again and I gotta make sure he is able to go out and stuff.” she spoke softly and worriedly. She helped me change my shirt and clean my face.

Ethan must’ve agreed because he pulled up to our house and helped me into the backseat. I was awake but still dizzy. 

“Hey buddy, I’m just taking you to the doctor right now. We’re gonna get you all checked up and make you feel better.” he patted my shoulder, my head was throbbing.

When we made it to the doctor he walked me in, I must have looked like death because some people stared at me with a look of fear. Ethan helped me into the doctor’s office and ended up leaving, I guess he was too scared to see the results.

By the time the tests were done, I was fully awake and standing on my own, it was like none of that stuff had happened. They had even washed my clothes for me. I was sitting in a room waiting for the ok for me to leave.

A doctor walked in with a clipboard. She was a bit shorter than me and she sat next to me.  
“Mr. Fishbach I have no other way to say this but you’re dying. You have a disease that is making you sicker and weaker by the hour. From the tests we ran it’s the only problem that we see.”

I was shaken up by this news and I blurted the first thing that came to mind “is there any way to cure this?”

“I’m afraid not. We haven’t discovered any type of solution. I’m going to be putting you on a testing list that any time there would be a test to something that could cure it you’ll be one of the first people to try it.” I nodded listening then I asked another question.

“How long do I have to live?”

“Well since we caught it earlier than most you have a year at most.” She sighed “what I advise you to do is to try to live your life as you normally would.” I nodded again and she let me leave.

I made my way out to the parking lot thinking about what I could do with my last year. Then it hit me. A channel that would only last for a year then it’ll be gone. A lesson to cherish what you have. I looked up names for one year and the best looking one was Unus Annus.

Looking up from my phone I saw Ethan leaning against his car worried. If anyone was going to do Unus Annus with me I want it to be him. He was always so good to me.

“Hey.” I spoke “I’m alright. I just have a bad flu. The doctors did tests to make sure it wasn’t my heart and it wasn’t.” I reassured him knowing that he would be worried about that

“Oh. That’s good atleast.” He sighed

“Uh hey I have an idea for a project. It’s called Unus Annus. It lasts for one year and then it’s gone forever. It’ll teach people to cherish what they have. Wanna do it with me?” I gave him a smile as we got in the car


	2. The clock is ticking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark tells Amy.

Ethan had a grin on his face telling me that maybe he did like it. He honestly had a nice smile. We always joked about him being the ugly ones but it was never true. When he did this certain smile he has a dimple on his left cheek. I ended up leaning my head against the cool window

“You don’t have to say yes right now,” I hummed “take some time to think about it, you can tell me maybe tomorrow or something.” he was quiet but he eventually spoke up.

“I think that sounds like a very interesting concept, ya know?” that put a smile on my face for a while, “I think once you start feeling a little better we should give it a shot.” he patted my knee which was honestly a bit weird. Although It’s Ethan so really what can I expect? He probably just meant it in a comforting sort of way.

Slowly my mind began to drift to Amy, then my parents, and then to all my other friends. How was I supposed to tell them all? A twang of guilt dropped in my stomach. I think I should tell Amy first. She’s always handled bad news well. But how do you tell someone that you’re going to die in a year? God, she’s gonna think I’m crazy.

“We’re here bud. Time for you to go get some rest.” Ethan had nudged my shoulder and I got out, Ethan walked with me to my front door and gave me a hug before getting in his car and left. I took a deep breath and entered the house shouting

“Amy I’m home!!” I shouted as Chica and Henry ran up to me, both of their tails wagging. I kneeled down to pet them both. They were such sweethearts. Chive wasn’t much of a kisser but Henry sure was.

“Ack- Kisses attack!” I laughed and gave Henry more love. That’s when Amy had come down from upstairs. I got up and started flexing to show her I was okay. For now. She smiled a little.

“So nothings wrong?” I was silent. I had to tell her. Her face just got more worried and I sighed. I led her to the dining room and sat down next to her. I have to do this. It’s going to hurt so bad to tell her. But she has to know.

“Amy… I-I should just be straightforward with this. I’m going to die…” I looked at her and she looked confused.

“Yeah. We’re all gonna die some day.” Chica came under the table and started to rub against my leg. I gave her some pet. While I took a deep breath.

“I mean... I’m going to die in a year.” My heart hurt so bad seeing her face turn from confusion to heart broken. Her eyes started to well up with tears and so did mine. She let out a cry and I hugged her. Silently crying on my own

“You can’t go… I love you so much… please don’t go.” She repeated these things every now and then and I would do my best to calm her down. She meant so much to me. To see her like this my heart couldn’t take it.

“Amy I love you so much. I just- I want to spend my last year with you and the doctor told me that I should live my life normally.” I held her face in my hands wiping her tears away. I gave her a kiss on the forehead and smiled at her “I’m just happy that my life was full of getting to love you.”

Amy hugged me one last time before we were both calm. Then I got an idea. I should ask her to be in Unus Annus.

“Hey when I was coming back from the hospital I had an idea to make a YouTube channel for my last year and it would be about cherishing what you have before it’s gone. Do you think you could do me and Ethan a favor and maybe be the producer?” She raises an eye brow at my question.

“Does Ethan know?” 

I nervously laughed “no. I haven’t told him about me but he did agree to Unus Annus.” She rolled her eyes playfully.

“Alright I’ll do it. It’s gonna be the best channel ever.” She had a light smile. I smiled back at her.

“Thank you,” finally I turned my attention to Chica “and you’re the bestest girl in the world.” I did my lovey voice when it came to her. She was my baby, then I thought of how I would see her again and it made me stop.

I held Chica close and tried not to cry again right after the whole crying fest with Amy. I doubt I have any tears left in me. I gave her a kiss on her snout. Henry was getting love from Amy.

“I should thank Ethan for driving me to the hospital,” I spoke without thinking much. Amy hummed in agreement and My mind wandered to Ethan. I hoped he was doing well. I kinda felt bad for just not saying a proper goodbye.

I hoped he would be okay when I passed. I don’t want him to be so hurt by this. I’ve seen him cry once, or technically heard him.

He had locked himself in my bathroom after a big fight with his ex about something. I think it was maybe a breakup. He was just sobbing and I wanted to help so badly that I just sat outside the door all night. Just to help him calm down.

The viewers and fans may think that Seán or Wade or Bob somebody else is my best friend. But it’s always been him. He was there for me when Jess… he was there. So through everything I’m always there for him.

We support each other. I couldn’t ask for anybody better. A smile appeared on my face and I was sucked out of my day dream by Chica and Henry barking at squirrels or birds. 

Amy got up and looked at me “you should call Ethan and tell him thanks.” That sounded like a good idea. So I got up and went to the bed room to get away from the noisey pups.

I grabbed my phone from my pocket and looked for his contact. I called him up and put it on speaker to let it ring.

Riiiiinnnnggg…

Riiiiiiiiiinnngg…

Riiinngggggggggg…

Riiiiiiiiiinnnggggggggg…

“Hey! This is Ethan! Sorry I couldn’t come to the phone rn but just leave me a voicemail and I’ll get right back to ya!” Ethan’s voicemail. He was probably busy but I left a voicemail anyways.

“Hey it’s Mark. I just wanted to say thank you for driving me to the hospital. I really couldn’t have done it without you. Also I got Amy to be our producer for Unus Annus so just call me and we can record whenever is fine for you.” 

I hung up and went to go make dinner with Amy. We ended up just having pancakes and watching a movie, before I fell asleep I couldn’t stop thinking about today. About how I am going to die.

Tomorrow I had to tell my parents. God fuck. Then I started thinking about Ethan, getting to spend that time with him was good. Even if I was dying. Maybe my last year won’t be so awful if it’ll be with him. He finally fell asleep with a smile on his face.


	3. Ethan’s secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ethan has a secret

When I had told my mom it broke my heart. She had told me that my dad had caught the same condition. I guess it just is hereditary. That she just told us it was a heart attack so we wouldn’t be scared of just dying one day with no reason why. 

If I was her I would have done the same so I can’t blame her. And with every person, I had told it slowly came down to Ethan being the last person. I just couldn’t bring myself to hurt him like that. 

When the first day of recording Unus Annus had come around we decided board games would be a fun idea. Connect four would be fun. He was black and I was white.

“Oh you’re going down buddy!!” Ethan was surely excited. I just hoped I didn’t have another incident but I played along.

“No way! I’m like way better than you could ever be! You’re just a big stinky!” I laughed at him

He frowned “well my name is Mark, and I have a big dick or whatever…” that made me laugh. Is that what he thinks of me? That I have a big dick? From my laughter, he smiled again.

That damn smile. It made me forget for a moment that everything wasn’t okay. After that bit, we went through discussing what we would be doing. 

I won most games and we were having a good time, we recorded about four or five episodes together. One of them being particularly cursed.

We decided it would be funny to make breakfast using sex toys. And it was, the food had actually turned out good. When we were making it Ethan had brought wolf ears, or were they fox ears?

Either way, they suited him well, he seemed to like them. When I tried them on I just looked odd. Like they were too tight for me. But it was still a fun thing to do. Most of the video would probably be us laughing our asses off. 

When we ate it was so hilariously awkward and from outside I could see the mailman directly staring at me which when I pointed out made everything 10x better.

Amy had been so sweet to help record and edit. I loved getting to laugh together, all three of us. It made me feel more comfortable. Like I wasn’t dying.

I loved getting to see Amy in her element. She always had this comforting fire about her that attracted me to her. It was so amazing. 

Ethan was always able to make me laugh. Even if I was depressed. He had something about him that would make the world a little brighter and better. I guess I really didn’t know how to explain him. He was just- amazing.

I did have a small incident, I had to throw up in the trash can but I blamed it on the food being terrible. It was a joke though. In all honesty, Ethan was an amazing cook. I just didn’t want people to worry.

At the end of recording we were all starving even if some of the videos were about cooking. It was pretty dark outside so we agreed to go get dinner together.

“What is everyone craving tonight?” I stood up and stretched.

Ethan looked out the window for a second, “how about Olive Garden?” I could already tell that was a good idea. 

Amy looked back at Ethan "You guys can go, I'll stay here and watch the dogs. Just bring me a breadstick and some salad." I gave a nod and grabbed my keys

"Anything else, like a drink?" 

She shook her head. "I'm fine, but thank you." 

I said my goodbye and kissed her forehead before driving me and Ethan to Olive Garden. We sat down at a table for two when Ethan asked

“What do you think you’re gonna get?”

“I don’t know yet, what about you?” He shrugged at my question which is fine. We went through staring at our menus. Seafood alfredo with water sounded the best to me. I put my menu down in front of me and my mind started to wander thinking about the male in front of me. He had definitely gotten a haircut recently, it wasn’t much shorter but it was noticeable enough for me.

I guess I watched him for awhile, seeing him smile to himself about something, it made me smile a little. His damn smile always got to me. He always seemed like a ray of sunshine when he does anything really. It was good to see him happy.

When he had finally looked up from his menu I looked away awkwardly, I started to stare out the window thinking of things we could talk about. 

“So did you decide what you wanted?” I asked casually

“Yeah, I did.'' Then he gave me a half smile which somehow still was as good as a full smile. “How about you?” I simply just nodded in reply feeling content. Then a short young lady came up to us

“Are you guys ready?” she smiled politely. So I spoke up first.

“Yeah, I would like the seafood alfredo and water.” I handed her my menu and then Ethan chimed in.

"Uh, yeah. I would like the Cheese Ravioli, with a peach tea. Thank you." he smiled back at her and handed her his menu. I mumbled a thank you as well.

“So how are you and Mika?” I asked and he was quiet for a moment

“We’re alright I guess, just going through the ups and downs,” when I had looked back he was shrugging. He wasn’t telling the truth. He always gets too quiet when he lies.

“Did you have another fight recently?” I was a little concerned, it worried me what she did to him. I hated seeing him get hurt like that. It saddened me. He was an amazing person and deserves someone better than a person who constantly fights with him.

“Yeah but it was just a small fight. Nothing too bad.” he seemed uncomfortable so I changed the subject and we went on to have a good chat. The lady came back with our drinks shortly. When she had set my drink down I went to take a sip when she said this.

“You guys make a really cute couple.” she smiled innocently as I choked on my water slightly. And Ethan spoke up

“It’s not like that we’re just really good friends.” and she blushed from embarrassment, 

“Oh my gosh I am so sorry-” this time I spoke up

“It’s alright. We get that mistaken sometimes.” I reassured her, still a little shocked. She just looked at the ground embarrassed  
“Your guy’s food will be out soon.” she walked away swiftly. I looked back at Ethan and he laughed a little

“Well that was awkward.” I laughed a little with him, after all of today’s recording this might be the second weirdest. Cooking with sex toys was weirder. Most definitely. 

“Well we’ve had weirder..” we went back to our conversation and had a nice time. Then our food came and we ate in peace. I tried my best not to be a loud eater, I know it bothers some people. I had gotten a pasta salad for Amy along with some breadsticks as a thank you for staying home. 

When the bill came around Ethan was reaching for his wallet 

“Hey, don’t worry about it. It’s alright. I’ll pay for it.” I gave him a soft smile as I paid for the dinner. He smiled his amazing smile back at me. 

On our way back, the entire time Ethan seemed uncomfortable and bothered by something so when I parked on the curb of a random neighborhood and looked at him he seemed a little concerned.

“Why are we stopped?” he questioned.

“Well you’ve been seeming like you’re uncomfortable so I’m just letting you know that you always have me to talk to. I know it may not seem like it but I really care about you. If you got something on your mind then I’m always going to listen and try to help as best I can.” I was concerned about all the fighting taking a toll on Ethan’s health. “I will always love you Ethan. You can trust me.”

Thinking about him being hurt genuinely hurt my heart, which is why I couldn’t tell him I was dying. I couldn’t hurt him like that. I had to keep the secret. I watched him fiddle with his shirt and glance outside the window.

“I don’t know how to say it.” I tried to calm him down a bit so he could tell me what’s going on.

“You can take your time. I’m always here to talk.” When I saw him relaxed it put me at ease.

“I've never told anyone this before, so you can't tell anyone.” I placed my hand on his shoulder gently, giving him a soft smile. He finally made eye contact with me.

“I promise I won’t tell anyone, not even Chica.” he laughed at my joke, which made my heart jump a little with happiness. Most of my jokes were honestly shit. Sometimes I don’t even understand why people find me funny. Ethan is so much more entertaining. 

"I…" He mumbled the rest so I reassured him 

"It's okay, take your time." Itook my hand away to not seem weird.

"I am…" I waited from to tell me what he wanted. I would hate to rushhim into something he doesn’t want. god knows he getsenough of if that from Mika.But he did sigh eventually.

"Mark, I'm Bisexual." he had put his hand on my knee again and looked me in the eye. I felt a little shocked but honored and happy for the most part. He deserves someone good wether that’s a girl or a guy. Thinking about Ethan dating a guy gave me a weird feeling but not a bad one.

"Mark?" I snapped back when he said my name

"Sorry I'm just speechless. Holy shit. Wow." He looked excited but scared. 

"I feel honored, being the first to know." I Smiled at him proudly and he smiled back "How long have you felt this way?" 

He shrugged at my question. "Since high school I think and I felt like I could trust you with this."

“Well, I promise you that you can. I will always be here to support you Ethan.” I gave him a hug feeling good that my friend could trust me enough to say that. 

When I had drove him back to our house and he had left I felt different somehow. Not good or bad. Just different. Like I could have died without knowing that. I’m happy to have him in my life.

Some people have always asked me if I am gay and often times I don’t know how to answer. I’m pretty sure I’m straight. But I guess it just depends on the person.


	4. Bad dreams and confused feelings.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark takes a quiz then has a bad dream.

Today was especially a weird one. Our episodes consisted of cursed things. One particular episode was we had to paint each other naked.

It was just body painting and then some drawing. We wore skin color underwear so we weren’t completely naked but it still felt like it. 

When we had explained what the episode was about I made a joke

“We’re doing this because were totally gay for eachother.” I was sarcastic and laughed a little at my dumb joke. Ethan just rolled his eyes

“Whatever. You just want a piece of this.” He did a weird dance and it cracked me up.

We went through our painting. I painted him as the anti-flash because of how slow his brain can be. Even if he was dumb he was still a treat to be around.

He painted me as poison Ivy which I honestly liked. He tried his best and I appreciate that. Ethan was more built than I expected. It made me feel something again. I couldn’t stop staring at his body, he wasn’t too skinny but not too muscular. I had been caught staring every now and then making me blush a little from embarrassment I hope.

So at the end of the video we hugged and had some good laughs. I loved making him smile. When he left I felt a feeling of sadness. It made me feel confused on what I was into. I let Ethan shower here because I wouldn’t want him to go home covered in paint.

Am I gay? I shrugged off the question and left to shower after Ethan had left. The paint stuck to my skin a little. But a part of me liked it. I blushed at the thought of having Ethan’s mark on me. I shook off the feeling and went to record. Looking through all the comments of ‘are you gay???’ on my latest video talking about Unus Annus with Ethan. 

So for a video I decided why not do an “Am I Gay?” quiz for fun? Going throughout the quiz was simple enough. Then I went off on a bit of a tangent.

“This reminds me of when I was a kid and guys would always say tits or ass. I always lied and said ‘Definitely tits.’ But I always felt like I wanted to meet the person first, if someone has no ass but big tits and they’re a sweet person. The first thing I’m going to do is try to get to know you whether you are a guy or girl? Because yes I do find some guys attractive. I think Zac Efron-”

I ended up looking at pictures of Zac Effron and did my joking “OHHH” but he did make me feel butterfly like. Then I started to think about Ethan.

“Also with Ethan, There are things about him that I find attractive about him. Most of it is having that connection with him. He is my best friend. I care a lot about him.” 

I had looked up a lady who actually was Trans. Which reminded me of a story.

“I also think that you are still attractive if you are trans. Whether you are male, female, not a gender, or genderfluid, or whatever you are.” I eventually went back to the quiz, making jokes on random questions casually. I eventually started to doubt if this was a good video but I can just record more. 

I had to get the results.

I had to know.

It’s been driving me crazy for awhile now. Because everytime I’m around Ethan I get all caring and it makes me feel like I need to be near him because I don’t have time left. 

I took a deep breath and shook my head. I sent the answers and covered my eyes with my hands. 

I peeked through my hands and dropped them to my sides. Pansexual. I am Pansexual. That makes sense… I guess. I played it off as a joke.

“Well thanks to everyone for sitting through this boring ass video. I thought it would finally be an answer to all the dumb ‘are you gay?’ questions. I hope this satisfies everyone. I am Pan apparently. And I will see you all… in the next video. BUH-BYE!!” 

In honesty I think that was a good video recording. I ended up making some other videos working on dead dreams which was terrifying. Amy came in with a small sticky note and hugged me from behind. 

“I heard you recording the first video aaandd I wanted to give you some support.” she handed me the sticky note that was a doodle of me with the pansexual flag. I chuckled. It was so adorable. 

“How do you know that I wasn’t just making a big joke of it all?” she shrugged and laughed at me. I pulled her close and hugged her waist.

“Well you were doing your most awkward laugh. You do it when you’re lieing about it being fake.” I blushed embarrassed. 

“Oh. I see.” she kissed my cheek smiling softly

“It’s alright. I love your awkward laugh and I love you just the way you are.” I smiled back at her feeling my heart warm again. She’s so special to me. But then I realized something. 

She heard me.   
She HEARD me.

She could hear me talking about Ethan like I was in love with him or something. Maybe she didn’t hear that part. I just have to ask.

“So uhh… how much of the video DID you hear?” I asked and she just shrugged.

“Dunno but I did hear you talk about Ethan, you know it’s a lot more obvious than you think.” She looked kinda uncomfortable but at the same time like a best friend would look. I just blushed with embarrassment at her statement.

“I think I do like him, in that sort of way. But- that doesn’t mean I don’t still love you, because I do love you. So much.” she just nodded with a smile

“Well good. And to celebrate you coming out of the closet a little let’s go get korean barbeque!!”

We left and went to eat at a good restaurant together, we ended up having a good time together. By the time we were home I was tired from the long drive and just wanted to crawl in bed and sleep. 

I changed into a t-shirt and boxers and ended up falling asleep pretty easily with Chica on my left and Henry next to Amy. When I drifted off to sleep I had a dream. The whole room was dark and I walked around until I heard a scream. 

IT WAS AMY. I followed the scream as long as I could until I heard another one. But it was different.

Ethan? I started to run again until I had come up to a window, the other side there was a white room fully cushioned and there was two chairs, one the left it was Amy who was bruised and had a busted lip, her clothes were torn in some places, my heart sent a twang of hurt.

On the right it was Ethan, he looked worse than Amy, having a good black eye and blood everywhere. He had been stabbed in the shoulder pretty good. In Between them there was a table full of medical tools, some rusted with blood already.

I quickly looked around the room I was in to find a way to get them out, when I had looked back there was a man standing between them with a sickening smile on his face.

“Well Mark, you have to choose, will it be Amy or Ethan who lives?” the voice was distorted. I couldn’t really make it out. It reminded me of when I did Darkiplier. I took another good look at the face

it was me.

I tried to yell but I couldn’t, my voice was as silent as a mouse as I tried to make some type of noise. The other me grabbed what looked like to be a serrated knife off of the table. Why didn’t I notice that before?

So that was it. I started to pound my hands against the glass window. Watching as he went to Ethan holding the knife to his neck.

The glass started to crack. I pounded harder putting all the force I had into it. 

But it was too late. Ethan let out a scream that had died out by choking. His head slumped down and Amy screamed in fear. Ethan was soaked in his own blood. I had to save them. Tears started to flow down my cheeks. I tried to scream but nothing came out. 

I threw my shoulder against the window this time as he got closer to Amy, the glass started to crack more. When her last scream had rung out. 

I couldn’t save them. 

I screamed with rage.

Suddenly I was awake. I shot up from laying in bed, my face was wet, and my phone was ringing. I looked over at the nightside table. Ethan. Looking to my other side I saw Amy peacefully sleeping. So I grabbed my phone and walked downstairs into the kitchen. I answered it.

“Hello?”

“H-hey…” Ethan sounded distraught, like he had been crying.

“What’s wrong?”

“O-oh nothing… Just- I got into another fight with Mika.” he sighed and then sniffled “It was bad. Pretty bad.” I listened intently. 

“Well what was it about?” he took a shaky breath.

“I don’t even really know how to explain it. I-I guess I accused her of cheating and she got mad I didn’t trust her. I’m just being a sh-shitty boyfriend... “ I could hear he’s holding something back.

“Hey, you’re not a bad boyfriend, you have not once been a bad boyfriend to her. If you suspected something then it’s good you brought it up.” I hated when Ethan would put himself down like that. He’s so sweet and funny. He always tries his best.

He started to cry softly “Mark… I-I’m not good enough for her, she’s just gonna leave me because I’m a shitty boyfriend.” I felt my heart get mad. Not because he was crying, but because she would hurt him like this time and time again. It disgusted me. I sat down on my kitchen floor leaned against the cabinet drawers.

“Ethan you listen to me right now,” I used a stern voice to make my point “You are so sweet, and funny, and you are amazing. You treat her so well and if she thinks she’s too good for you than her standards are way too high. You are my best friend. I love spending time with you and getting to see your smile and hear you laugh. If she’s gonna take you for advantage then SHE doesn’t deserve YOU.” I sighed. 

He was still crying now more heavily. 

shit. 

“But Mark I love her. I don’t want her to leave me. I don’t want anyone to leave me.”

“Ethan, I swear for as long as I live and even after that. I will never leave you. I’m always here for you.” I wish I could hold him and just calm him down, then I remembered something “Hey Ethan?”

“Yeah M-mark?” he sniffled

“Can you go get a cup of water for me?” he made a confused noise “Just do it.” I heard his quiet cries and shuffling to get a cup of water. “Just drink it slowly. You’ll run out of tears to cry.”

Eventually he calmed down but was still sniffling. Which was the best thing I was gonna get.

“Why did you want me to do that?...”

“When I was young my mom would give me a cup of water when I cried and said ‘You’ll run out of tears to cry.’ drinking the water helped me calm down and get my thoughts together.” I said with a tired smile.

He let out a little chuckle “you’re mom is the best. Just thank you for helping me tonight. I’m sorry if I woke you up. You really are a good friend.”

“It’s alright. I was having a nightmare anyways. I always try to be a good friend for you.” 

I could hear soft breathing on the other line, like he was asleep. So I took a deep breath whispering to him “Goodnight Ethan, I love you.” before hanging up and going back to bed with a glass of water.


	5. We need to talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark has another attack, Amy needs to talk to him, and he has to tell Ethan something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to write, quarantine has been hitting way to hard and I’ve been feeling like shit. But hope y’all like this! Next chapter is gonna be a spicy one! ;)

It had been a few weeks since I had that call with Ethan. I had been worried about him ever since. I guess I have been more protective too because the viewers were always talking about how touchy we were. I hadn’t noticed much.

Ethan had asked to meet me before recording at his house. Which I agreed too obviously. If something was wrong I had to help him.

He let me inside and I followed him to the living room. He took a deep breath and spoke softly

“You remember the late night call?” I nodded

“Yeah,, I remember. That was the night of you and Mika’s big fight.” 

He looked more and more nervous by the second. “Well um that wasn’t all that happened... “ he went silent so I started to get more concerned

“Ethan...What else happened?” I tried to be calming but stern.

“Sh-she hit me…” he was more quiet and scared, but my jaw dropped. I couldn’t believe someone would do that to him “I-I was mad so I got closer to her a-and she just slapped me.” I guess thinking about it made him upset.

“Ethan… That is not okay. And that is definitely not nothing.” I got closer to him inspecting his face for any injury. He was so close to me I could kiss him.

Right then.

Nobody would’ve known.

Then I thought of Amy and I backed away a little

“Mark I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before. I just didn't know how.” 

“N-no it’s alright. I understand. Just don't take that shit from her anymore. You’re too good for her to treat you like that.” I spoke softly. “I promise you I won’t let that happen again.”

I gave him a hug and comforted him a little. It hurt my heart so bad to know he’d been abused like that. I made a promise to myself I wasn’t going to let it happen again. But hugging him was so nice.

I wished I could have stayed like that forever with him. Not to be weird but he smelled good, like peaches. My brain thought about us just cuddling together, it was nice. I talked to him to calm him down until he was ready to leave.

I drove him to the recording place, holding his hand for reassurance. He needed me and I would be there for him

We ended up learning salsa for one of our episodes. Amy has to stay home to record her own videos so we brought in our Friend Evan to record. Everything was going fine until it hit me. I started to get dizzy.

God no.

Not now.

Not in front of him.

I played it cool. For the most part, I just pretended I needed to take breaks to breathe. Which was partially true.

Dancing was hard but it was worth it. The teacher instructed us and we joked around. Ethan even pretended to kiss me. Deep inside I wish he did. But then I thought of Amy and I ignored that wish.

When it had come to the lift, things started to get fuzzy. I lifted Ethan up and when I set him backdown I had to stop.

I stumbled around for balance, until everything in my stomach had come up. Vomit was everywhere. It sickened me even more and Things went black.

Every now and then I could hear things.

Ethan’s screams.

The sirens.

The damn beeping of a monitor.

All the while I had a dream. Or more like just talking.

“So… you think you’re all fine and dandy… You’re dying Mark. You’re hurting them so much..”

No! I don’t want to hurt them… I love them.

“You’ll be with me soon…”

Suddenly everything got a little clearer. I heard sobbing, and a monitor, the chatter of different people. I slowly opened my eyes.

I was in a hospital room. I looked to my left to see Ethan crying. My heart hurt so bad. So this is how he’d find out. I wanted to tell him. But I couldn’t. I didn’t want to put him through the pain.

I shifted in my bed with a groan of pain. He looked up and his whole face changed from distraught to excited, but in a sad way.

I tried to speak but my voice croaked

“Ethan…” he got close to the bed I was laying in and took my hand.

“I-I’m here buddy… it’ll- It’ll be okay…” tears streamed down his cheeks and I hated myself for hurting him like this. I reached out and tried to wipe his face

“I’m okay…” I whispered to him. My throat was so dry. It took me awhile before I felt okay. I sat up and gave his hand a squeeze to reassure him, he did get me some water which I appreciated a lot.

The water hit my throat like a river in a desert. I felt so much better, The doctor had come in. It was a different doctor this time, this doctor was taller with a different type of jacket. 

“Hello, Mr. Fishbach I just wanted to give you an update on your condition.” the doctor spoke, I looked over at Ethan. He looked quizzed and looked over at me. 

“What… condition?” he sounded scared, scareder than I was. My gut dropped, guilt filled my system as I heard the doctor speak. 

“Mark has a rare disease called Zycolate, his body is killing himself to put it lightly. Also from the looks of previous tests he has less than a year to live.” I wanted him to shut up. Just stop talking. STOP TALKING.

Ethan was silent. I cleared my throat.

“Is there any new test medication?” I asked as a way to break the silence

“Yes, there is actually it’s called Queltin. You’ll need to take it when you wake up and before you go to bed every day. If you seem to be feeling better you are allowed to go home. For now I will give you two a minute alone and go get your medicine” the doctor did end up leaving.  
It was back to silence until Ethan spoke with a shaky voice.

“So when were you going to tell me? When you were being lowered into the dirt?” tears were flowing down his face, which was red from anger. 

“Ethan I-” 

“NO! I care so much about you Mark, I thought I was your best friend but you didn’t even tell me about this!!” Snot started to flow down his face “Now you’re gonna be gone in less than a year!! You’re gonna leave me..” he started to sob. I grabbed his arm

“Ethan. I promised you even after I passed I would still be there for you. I stand by that promise. I’ll even stay over at your house tonight if it’ll make you feel better. I didn’t tell you because I was afraid. Afraid of the pain it might cause for you to know about it. I didn’t want you to hurt this bad. I’m sorry.” I sighed “That’s the reason I asked you to be in Unus Annus and not Seán or Wade or Amy. Because I wanted to spend my last year with you.”

I looked him in the eyes as I said that and it was quiet a little before Ethan started to cry again. I pulled him into a hug and somehow it ended up with Ethan laying on that hospital bed with me. I had my arm wrapped around him and his head was on my shoulder. I ran a hand through his hair. It was soft. 

My face was warm from the blood rushing to it. I wish I could’ve stayed like that forever. 

“Ethan it’ll be okay. I will make sure we have lots of good memories together and hey maybe this new medicine will solve everything.” he eventually calmed down. But we stayed like that for awhile. My arm started to go numb under his weight so he got off the bed. 

Then a lightbulb went off in his brain and he smiled

“I almost forgot Amy gave me some clothes to give to you!”

Right. Amy. Guilt started to seep in again as I thought about her. I really should call her and tell her about the medicine. And that I love her.

He held out the bag clothes and I stood up to take them. My legs felt sore. But it was manageable.

“Well thank you Amy.” I chuckled. I made my way down to a little changing area. I looked at the clothes before me. A pair of jeans, some clean underwear and socks, and my favorite raptor tank top. The last article of clothing I didn’t recognize. It was a white hoodie. Looking at the front I saw the logo.

Unus Annus.

I teared up a little. Our first merch we released. It was the founder's design I had thought of. Wiping my face I put on the new hoodie. And slipped on my shoes I walked back over to Ethan.

“You look good.” he half joked with me. I flexed to make him laugh a little “So uh… were you joking about that staying over thing? Because honestly I need that.” he seemed really shy about asking but I put my hand on his shoulder and smiled softly 

“Then I will stay over at your house tonight.” he grinned at me “But first I gotta call Amy and let her know what’s going on. Don’t want her to think I’ve been kidnapped or something.” Ethan nodded and I grabbed my phone from the bedside table. 

The doctor walked in and gave me my medicine, I thanked him and he showed us where to leave.

Thanking him again, me and Ethan left. I called Amy on the walk to the bus station. Ethan didn’t bring his car this time.

“Heya!” Amy sounded Cheerful. It made me smile. I could listen to her voice for hours.

“Hey Sweetheart, I am back from the hospital. I got prescribed a test medication. It’s called Queltin.” I looked at the bottle in my hand, stuffing it in my hoodie pocket.

“Oh well that’s great. I’m glad that it was just an accident.” I was lucky this time.

“Yeah me too. Hey Uh I’m gonna stay over at Ethan’s tonight. He found out and he’s not taking it well.” I scratched the back of my neck looking over at him. He was messing with his hair in his own little world.

It made me smile a little. Warmed my heart to see it.

“Oh…” Amy sounded disappointed. A twang of guilt hit me in the stomach. “Th-that’s alright. Ya know. I don’t want him to be panicking…” another hit.

“Yeah well I’ll stop by for some clothes n stuff and I’ll see you tomorrow okay?”

“Okay.”

“Love you…” I said cautiously

“Yeah.” She hung up. 

Fuck. 

I tried to not to let the call bother me too much. I wanted to keep Ethan happy. Not let him worry about me too much.

The bus ride consisted of people being too close for comfort, I grabbed Ethan’s hand so I wouldn’t lose him. HIs hands were... nice. Maybe it was a weird thing to say but it was in my head at least. I liked getting to hold his hand. 

I looked away from him to keep him from seeing me blush. Instead I focused on my phone listening to the call for our stop. I started to lose myself in thought.

I haven’t gotten around to posting that gay quiz video, Maybe I should just tell him that I’m pan. Wouldn’t be too hard right? I just need to say ‘hey Ethan, I’m actually pan.’ its dumb. I’ll just wait for the right time.

We had probably gotten to our stop because Ethan had started to pull me off the bus. After a short walk and some small chat we reached my house.

Walking in I saw Amy sitting on the couch with a duffle bag in her lap. 

“Hey, this is unusual…” I gave her a smile but she wasn’t smiling. Her eyes were puffy and red like she had been crying or doing drugs. Probably crying.

“Mark we need to talk.” She stood up putting the duffle bag strap on her shoulder. “I-I can’t be in a relationship with you anymore…” 

I went quiet, I couldn’t believe it.

“What? You’ve got to be kidding.” I spoke unconvinced. She took a deep breath.

“I love you, but you love Ethan… And I don’t want to be pushed to the side anymore. I would love to still be friends with you. But I can't be with you romantically. You are in love with your best friend who is being emotionally hurt by their relationship. Go spend the rest of your time with your true love. Save them from that.” She started to walk out the door.

“But Amy I love you. You mean so much to me.”

She looked back at me

“You mean a lot to me too. Which is why I have to do this.” She gave me one last hug and she left in her car. Henry and Chica had walked downstairs to see the comotion.

I was still standing there. When they licked my pant legs I knelt down to them

“Mommy gonna be gone for awhile. W-were gonna go on an adventure to Ethan’s house…” I had nowhere else to take them. I grabbed their leashes, food and water bowls, a few toys, and my clothes and toiletries. I packed my things into a backpack. I had the dog’s things in a separate bag.

Ethan walked in to check on me “are you okay buddy?” He leaned against the frame of the front door. I looked at him for a long time being quiet. I was in love with him.

“Yeah I-I’m okay. Amy and I are broken up…” he gasped.

“Oh Mark I’m so sorry..” he hugged me and I hugged back. I needed a hug. He still smelled like peaches with a hint of vomit. Maybe that smell was from me. But I showered.

“I-I’m alright really. I just want to have a good night with you.” I wasn’t over with the hug. I ran a hand through his hair. Still soft. Still Ethan.

I smiled a little bit and let go. He smiled back at me and helped me take everything to my car. I wasn’t able to drive so he would have to. 

I got the dogs in the back, on their bed that we use for car rides. I really do spoil these puppies. They deserve it though.

They bring nothing but joy to my life. I remember the first day I got Chica, she was so cautious of everything. I knew I wanted to protect her forever.

The day we got Henry was full of love.

I looked back at both of them from the passenger seat. Ethan held my hand while he drove. Half for his comfort and half for mine. That small smile wouldn’t leave my face.

We stopped at Wendy’s for dinner because it was already pretty dark out. I gave Chica and Henry a piece of my burger just to make them happy.

When we got to his house I smiled and got out. Ethan let the dogs inside. I liked going to his house.

It always felt lived in. Which I liked. I bet it’s nice living with him. On camera he seems like a lot but off Camera he’s more chill and caring. I like that about him. 

I started to think about living with him every day but I was brought out by Ethan’s voice

“So uh you can put your stuff in my room if you want and I can sleep on the couch.”

“No it’s alright you take the bed it’s your house. I don’t want to seem rude.” He must’ve had an idea because his demeanor changed.

“W-What if we both sh-shared the bed…” he was more nervous. It made me blush red.

“A-Alright… sharing it is.” I left to go set my bags down. God I hope he didn’t see my blushing. He was cute when he was shy.

We ended up watching a good movie to end the night off. I leaned against him to relax. We watched the sonic movie. In all honesty it was nice. It did make me cry a little. But Ethan comforted me which was nice.

By the time we were both tired the movie had ended. I changed into my rex tank top and just took my pants off. I hope he didn’t mind. He’s seen me in boxers before. 

I waited until he had changed to come out of the bathroom. Taking my meds as well. Chica, Henry, and Spencer were all on the bed. Leaving just enough room for me. 

I climbed in and we relaxed. It was quiet for awhile but this felt as good as I’ll ever get to tell him.

“Hey Ethan?” He shifted a little.

“Yeah Mark?”

“So um I got something important to tell you.” He was quiet for a little.

“Go on..”

“I’m uh, I’m actually pansexual… I realized that not to long ago.” It was quiet again until I felt an arm drape over me.

“I’m really happy for you buddy.” I could tell he was smiling. I was too.

“Thanks… I am too..” After that I fell asleep with a smile on my face and an arm wrapped around Ethan.


End file.
